


this whole damn city thinks it needs you (but not as much as I do)

by rosewritesstuff



Category: Iron Man (Movies), Marvel Cinematic Universe, The Avengers (Marvel Movies)
Genre: Alternate Universe, Alternate Universe - No Powers, F/M, Pepperony - Freeform
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2018-08-24
Updated: 2019-04-20
Packaged: 2019-07-01 19:48:39
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 9
Words: 9,048
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/15780882
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/rosewritesstuff/pseuds/rosewritesstuff
Summary: There are no superheroes and yet Tony Stark is still a badass genius billionaire who’s about to confess to Pepper that he’s madly in love with her... but she somehow gets engaged to Aldrich Killian, who is still a jerk.





	1. Chapter 1

He’s Tony Stark. He’s a charming genius, billionaire, and so on. He can do whatever on earth he wants to do... except for one thing.

He just can’t declare his feelings for Pepper Potts.

But for God’s sake, he has to. He can’t keep waiting for a perfect moment, because clearly a perfect moment is not just going to show up. He knows that. That’s why he always makes the moment his, but when it comes to Pepper, he just doesn’t know how to. Which is weird, considering how many women he has gone out with. But Pepper.... she’s not them. She wouldn’t buy his cheap tricks, not only because she knows better than that, but because she knows him better than everybody else.

Pepper Potts has been with him for so long that he doesn’t really keep count anymore. Not with him, as in romantically, but with him as in working with him, at his company. She started as his assistant, and eventually became his COO. His right hand, she knows everything about him, including the things that probably keep him from telling her the truth, like the fact that she knows that he’s always been a player. 

But he doesn’t want to be one anymore. Not with her. 

It was hard for him to realize the nature of his feelings, really. They had never had an affair, not even a little fling, they hadn’t even ever kissed, but somehow she would always be on his thoughts, even when he tried to avoid that line of thinking because he knew that the foundation of their relationship was professional trust, and then mutual trust, in the kind of way that you trust your best friend. And you know what people say: sometimes, trust can suck. 

But still, the thoughts were always there, and one night, after a heavy round of drinking and a hookup that ended up pretty badly, he somehow found himself on the floor of his penthouse, at 3 in the morning, thinking about the fact that there was nobody in the world that he cared most about than Pepper. And after that, he thought about how he knew that she cared about him, an awful lot, because if she didn’t, she wouldn’t keep up with all of his crap, and she did. And then, after that, he thought about how he couldn’t even remember how was his life before her, and then, just then, he thought -no, he felt- for the first time that he might’ve been in love with her. And oh, wow, that meant that there were a lot of feelings for him to deal with.

He had never been in love before that moment. He had never been in an actual relationship. He had never had a real girlfriend, ever. He had just gone out with uncountable women, sometimes for a day, sometimes for some more, and then he would just leave them just like that, simply because he was able to do that, or because he never saw himself like the kind of person that settles down, or because he had never felt all of that emotional stuff that everybody else seemed to feel. But at that moment, he knew it, and he felt his heart sinking deep in his chest. 

Or maybe it was the mix between the feeling, the alcohol and his heart condition what he was really feeling, but at that moment he knew that he had to tell Pepper about his feelings, because even if he didn’t say anything, he already knew it and he was never going to be the same, because the four letter word would always be hanging over his head, waiting to crush him at any given time.

However, it’s been more than a month since that moment and he hasn’t gotten himself to talk to her. Until now.

The best way to talk to someone about your feelings is face to face, right? Or so he’s heard. So, when he saw her in her office, he knew that he had to do it right then. He had thought about inviting her to dinner, but he decided against all of that in that moment. He knocked on her glass door and asked her for five minutes of her time, she nodded while talking on the phone, and he stepped in. He took a seat in front of her desk and he admired the great view of NYC’s financial district. He really liked her office, all white and tidy, with all of her little details. He waited until she hanged the phone, and then he took a deep breath.

“Tony. What happened? Is there a situation going on?”  
“Why are you assuming that something bad happened? Can’t I just be a good friend who comes around to visit you?”  
“Well, basically, no. I mean, you could, but we both know that you’re not. You only come here when you have a problem. Actually, you don’t even come here, you usually just phone me and ask me to go to your office.”  
“Well, that might be true, but, in my defense, I have a heart disease.”  
“So?”  
“So, that coming here could get me tired and all of that, while you’re so young and full of energy.”  
“We’re the same age, and your heart condition certainly doesn’t stop you from doing other kind of activities.”  
“Ouch, Potts.”  
“I’m just saying the truth, Tony.”  
“Well, that’s not true anymore. I mean, not everything. We clearly are the same age, but I’m not involved in those aforementioned activities anymore.”  
“Aren’t you? What happened? Is that the problem that you need to talk about?”  
“I told you I don’t have a problem, Potts. I’m just over one night stands and that kind of stuff.”  
“Well, congratulations, then. At least I don’t have to worry about that now.”  
“You worry about that?”  
“Of course I do. I’m always worried that you will end up in a dumpster after one of your exes try to kill you. Besides, you know I worry about your health, and drinking that much to impress shallow girls can’t be healthy.”  
“They’re not my exes, I never dated them.”  
“Whatever you say, boss. Anyway, we really drifted away and the five minutes are over, I can see Christine doing all sort of signs to get my attention. What was the issue, Tony?”  
“Can’t we have five more?”  
“I don’t really think so. I have to get to a meeting, but I still can give you thirty seconds to tell me what’s going on.”  
“Well, I’ll need more than that. Can we have dinner tonight?”  
“Tonight? I think so... oh no, sorry, not tonight. Tomorrow?”  
“Why can’t it be tonight?”  
“Is it really that urgent? I have some sort of appointment. I could cancel it, of course, but...”  
“No, it’s okay, tomorrow will do. I should’ve figured that you had plans for a Friday night.”  
“Well, it’s no really big deal, but you know that I don’t like cancelling things, and all of that. Is it really okay?”  
“Yeah, it’s okay, really. Don’t worry, go.”  
“Thanks, Tony. I’ll see you later.”  
“See-ya, Potts.”

And that was it. He watched her get her purse and go out down the hallway. He stayed in her office a few minutes, perks of being the boss, and thought about how that was going to be another day of him not telling Pepper about his feelings. But the next day, of course he would. That was the deadline.


	2. Chapter 2

Tony spent the whole night thinking about how he would tell Pepper that he was in love with her, but he really didn’t get into any conclusion. When he gave it much thought, it all would just become a blur in his head. He had never struggled with his words, but right then he felt like a two-year-old boy trying to explain rocket science. Bah. Rocket science was easy to him, feelings were the issue.

At some point he fell asleep, probably too late in the AM, because when he woke up it was past noon. Not that it really mattered, since it was Saturday. Actually, it wouldn’t have mattered anyway since he really didn’t care about getting early to work. But that day he felt ashamed. Not because of his sleeping late, but because what led him to the whirlpool of thought that kept him awake until who knows what time was not only his thinking about love, but the amounts of scotch that he drank. 

He really wanted to leave that. Like Pepper said earlier that day, he knew that it was bad for his health, but he couldn’t help himself but drink any time that he found himself in a social situation, or in a stressful situation, which was the case for that night. That’s the way his life had always been. Drinking your issues is easier than dealing with them. 

But not that day. He got up and checked his watch: 2 PM. Alright. There was still plenty of time to regain some composure.

He rechecked and reconfirmed the reservation he had made at his favorite restaurant, made some decaf, which he would need a lot of, and then he took a long shower, trying to make himself look like a functional human being and not like a hungover frat boy. He used that time to rethink everything, only to discover that he still had no idea on how to aboard the theme. Maybe he would actually need some alcohol after all. He spent the rest of the afternoon getting ready and looking at the clock every 10 minutes, thinking about how time decides to be a jerk when you need it to go a little faster.

Finally, at 7:15, he called his security chief/chauffeur, Happy, when he couldn’t stand the waiting anymore. He asked him to take him to the restaurant and then he would wait for Pepper until 8. She would be puntual, she always was, and he would be choosing something from their selection of wines and probably drinking a glass or two.

At 8, Tony was in a private room when a waiter informed him that Miss Potts had arrived. And that was the moment, there was no turning back. He asked her to show her the way in, and he got up to greet her.

She was astounding, long strawberry red hair down and a cocktail dress as blue as her eyes, and he was astounded, because ever since he declared to himself his feelings for her, he couldn’t stop looking at her like he had never seen her before. He only came back to earth when she did a little cough, as to remind him that she was there.

“So, Pepper. Hey. Or good evening, should I say, since we’re in a particularly fancy place.”  
“Good evening, Tony.”  
“Have a seat, Potts. Please, be my guest.”  
“Thank you, boss.”  
“May I tell you how astonishing you look tonight?”  
“Oh, please. Cut the show there, Stark.”  
“You’re the only one giving a show, Potts, looking like that.”  
“Come on, Tony. Now you’re just trying to make me blush and you know that that’s not going to work.” She was blushing, however, which he considered a good sign.   
“Whatever, Potts. Do you want some wine? You should have some wine. I chose this Cabernet for you.”  
“I’d like some wine, yes.”  
“Good. Because we need to talk and you might need to have a little bit of alcohol in your system.”  
“Oh, dear. Again with the mystery. Are you telling me what’s going on or not, Tony? Because you’re keeping me up all night trying to figure out what it is this time.”  
“Are you implying that I have caused you any trouble in the past?” He asked, while pouring some wine into their glasses.  
“Your middle name is ‘Trouble’.”  
“Actually, no. And all this time I thought you knew everything about me.”  
“Oh, I do. And for that reason I personally requested that your middle name was changed from ‘Edward’ to ‘Trouble’. It suits you better.”  
“Always so clever, Miss Potts.”  
“You already know that, Mr. Stark. You couldn’t have survived the last 8 years without me.”  
“It’s been only 8 years?”  
“8 years with you are like 8 dog years.”  
“Ouch.”  
“Dogs are lovely, Tony. You know I’m fond of them. Now, can we go back to the point?”  
“Right. The point. Sip your glass first, Potts.”  
“Tony, is it really that bad?”  
“It is not bad, at all. It’s just... complicated.”  
“Everything with you is complicated, to be fair.”  
“That’s accurate, actually.”  
“Indeed. Now, the point.”  
“Yes. The point.” He took a deep sigh. No matter how much thought he gave to it, there was no easy way to tell someone what he needed to say, especially when he hadn’t had any kind of practice ever. So, pause, another deep sigh, and there he went. “Pepper, did you say that I keep you up at night?”  
“Well, yes, sometimes, when I’m worried about you or about something that you’ve done, to yourself or to the company. Why? What does that have to do with what you need to tell me?”  
“Well, it might have a lot to do with it.”  
“How so?”  
“Pepper, what if you keep me up at night?”  
“What?”  
“I mean, what if you, hypothetically, kept me up at night, thinking.”  
“Like, worried? Tony, tell me I didn’t do something wrong with that business with the Canadian company...”  
“No, no, nothing at all. You’re wonderful at work, as usual, better than myself, to be quite honest. It’s just...”  
“Just... just what, Tony? I’m not understanding. You’ve been trying to tell me something for two days, and you’re not the kind of person to have difficulties communicating, so, what is it?”  
“It’s... it’s you, Pepper. You’re the point.”  
“I’m the point? I mean, I’m the issue that keeps you up at night? Are you firing me, Tony?”  
“No! How could you think that? I would never.”  
“Then what is it?”  
“Pepper, it is that I need you.”  
“Well, Tony, I know that. But what do you need me for, exactly? What do you have in mind?”  
“It’s... wait, Pepper, what is that thing?” She was sipping from his glass at that moment, and he saw something hideous at her hand, something that shouldn’t have been there. “Is that... a ring?”  
“Tony!” She slurped and blushed. “Yes.”  
“What kind of ring is that, Pepper?”  
“Well, I wanted to tell you. And I was going to. But I wanted to know your news first because you seemed so stressed. It’s... I got engaged, Tony.” Tony could’ve sworn that his mind went blank for a couple of seconds, long enough that Pepper would notice. “Tony? Are you okay?”  
“Okay? Oh, okay. Yes. I’m okay. Okay. Yes Pepper, everything’s okay.” It wasn’t okay, though. He was not okay. What he intended to say was certainly not okay. Nothing was okay. “Yes, again, sorry. I’m just... surprised. Engaged? To whom? Was that thing there yesterday? I can swear that you didn’t have that hideous thing there yesterday.”  
“No, it wasn’t there yesterday. It’s there since last night. And it’s not hideous, Tony.”  
“Last night!? And it is. It’s... too big. And golden. You don’t like golden. Who was dumb enough to give you a golden ring?”  
“I didn’t think that you knew that I don’t like golden things.”  
“Of course I know, Pepper! And who did that? You haven’t told me yet.”  
“Well, do you remember Aldrich?” She blushed, like she was uncomfortable.  
“Aldrich... as in... Aldrich Killian? Tell me you’re joking.”  
“I’m not... I mean, yes, Aldrich Killian.”  
“Are you still with him, Pepper? I thought you dumped him like ages ago.”  
“Why would I do that? No. We’ve been dating for... a couple months, and... that’s it.”  
“That’s it? You’ve been dating an egomaniac for a couple months and you decided that marrying him is a good idea?”  
“Well, Tony, apparently I’m surrounded by egomaniacs, and I... I like him.”  
“And I like giraffes, and you don’t see me marrying them.”  
“Tony, you’re overreacting.”  
“Am I? Sorry, I just got the news that you’re engaged to my nemesis, who probably is trying to get you away from me.”  
“Away from you? Tony I’m not going anywhere.”  
“Are you sure? He might want you to work for him now.”  
“He doesn’t. And if he wanted me to, I would say no. I’m with you.”

Rather than just replying to that, Tony took a deep, deep sigh. Great. Everything had just gone through the flush, just because he waited too long to talk to her. Of course, he didn’t even know that she was dating someone, but even then, he would’ve said everything if she weren’t wearing that stupid ring on his finger. But now? Now he couldn’t say that to her. That would just make him look stupid and she would probably think that he was just throwing a tantrum. And that would probably make him lose her, and he certainly couldn’t afford that. So, as painful as it was, he had to change the whole narrative.

“Good. I hope that you mean it, Potts, because I really need you right now. We’re going green.”  
“Green? What... are you okay, Tony? Wait... oh! The company?”  
“Exactly. I decided that we’re going full self sustainable now, Pepper, and I certainly need you now more than ever before.”  
“Tony! That’s great! I see now why you were nervous, it’s a huge step! But it’s amazing, really amazing.” There she was, all smiles, all happiness, and he couldn’t help but smile as well.  
“Yeah, well, that’s why I need my COO to be by my side and not with some other jerk.”  
“That won’t interfere at all, Tony. You have my word. I’m your COO, and you’re my boss, and my best friend.”  
“Thank you, Pepper. Really. I wouldn’t have made this decision if I didn’t think that I could count on you.”  
“I know, Tony. Thank you for the trust.”

Then, she took his hand, as to reassure him that he could count on her, and for a tiny moment they looked into each other’s eyes and Tony could’ve sworn that that hurt more than being stabbed with a sword. Not that he had ever been stabbed, but he was sure of it. But whatever, he had to face that pain with a smile, at least for the rest of the evening, and so he did.

They kept talking after that, about the boring business side of of converting the company to a full self sustainable one, even when at the start of the dinner Tony hadn’t had any intention of doing so, and about many other work things. They didn’t talk again about the engagement though. 

At the end of the night, Pepper left in a cab a few minutes before him, and then he saw Happy finally standing in front of the restaurant waiting for him. He was about to get in the car when he suddenly told Happy to wait for a few seconds. He went inside again, and then came back and got in the car, now with two bottles of wine. 

Being healthy could wait. That night, Tony didn’t want to think. He only wanted to drink, and drink as much as he possibly could.


	3. Chapter 3

Is drinking your life away the right way to deal with your emotional issues? Probably not, but Tony Stark doesn’t know any other way.

To be fair, probably nobody knows a better reaction to getting the news that the person who you’re about to confess your love to got engaged the night before with a dude who you’re sure is actually evil and who’s always been basically your business arch-nemesis.

Right, and that’s exactly what was going on in Tony’s life when he decided that he would drink two bottles of wine alone on a Saturday night, besides of what he had already drank at the restaurant, and then some scotch after the bottles of wine were empty.

Oh, and then there was the fact that he had decided in the blink of an eye that his company was going to become entirely self sustainable. Not that he had a problem with that, that was actually a great idea, but considering how big of a decision it was, he could’ve given it a bit more of thought rather than just using it as a escape route to avoid telling Pepper that he had serious feelings for her.

For those reasons, he spent the rest of the night drinking, thinking about how his timing had been just the worst, and then just being drunk, not knowing what else to do with his life.

So, it was certainly not a surprise when he felt like he was about to explode the next day. ‘Hungover’ would’ve been an understating to describe him, even though he was sure that he had drank much more than that before of that night. Maybe he was just getting old, or maybe he was not just hungover but... broken-hearted? That was certainly new. If that was what people felt when someone broke their hearts, he could totally recall now why he had avoided all kind of attachments his whole life.

He spent the whole day feeling like trash, with his head still numb from the alcohol and that awkward feeling that you get in every part of you body after ingesting too much booze, drinking lots of water and checking his heart rate monitor, worried that he was about to die at any minute. 

But even when the regular effects of heavy drinking disappeared, he still felt like something was wrong, deep down in his chest. The monitor didn’t show any abnormal activity, but his heart clenched with every thought that he had. Maybe he really was broken-hearted. Or maybe the monitor didn’t work anymore. Or maybe he just wanted to die at that exact moment.

He needed to talk to someone. But, God, he didn’t have no one to talk to. Except for one person.

Every time that he got himself into a problem bad enough to make him decide that drinking wasn’t going to solve it, he would reach out to the same person, and she would totally listen to him and understand him and offer him some really good advice or even a definitive solution and everything would be fine, but this time he could certainly not do that, because that person was Pepper.

He painfully realized that Pepper was not only his co-worker/platonic love, but his best friend. Or more specifically, his only friend. And then every inch of his soul felt in a pain so hard that he might or might not have silently cried himself to sleep, or to die. Whatever happened first.


	4. Chapter 4

Tony didn’t die, though, but people could’ve easily assumed that he did. Not that he actually tried try to make people think that he was dead, but probably some people thought about it when he didn’t show up at the company for a week. You could say a lot of things about Tony Stark, but to say that he didn’t take work seriously would’ve been a blatant lie.

People started to get worried about his not going to work, especially Pepper. She was worried about him not calling her because he had already told her about his new project for the company, and Tony’s the kind of person who would let a project take over his entire life; he would somehow obsess about it, more often than not in a very good way that would led him and whoever was involved in a path of great success. And she was involved in it, wasn’t she? 

But Tony didn’t call. Or took her calls either.

He was too busy trying to recompose himself, only that his methods were very unorthodox. 

After his nightmare of a Sunday, Tony said to himself that he wouldn’t be drinking ever again, or at least not anytime soon. There’s no need to say that he betrayed his own word that same night when he somehow ended up drinking half a bottle of whisky while half watching a terrible rom-com to sleep. When he tried to wake up the next day to go to work, he just decided that nobody would miss him if he took a day off. Plus, he was the boss, and what’d be the fun of being the owner and CEO of a company with your name if you can’t skip a Monday? And it was just going to be one day and one day only.

Only that it wasn’t.

Tony realized that spending a Monday recovering from a hangover is somehow even more miserable than recovering from a hangover any other day, and by some sort of twisted logic he also thought that the only thing that would make that any less miserable was going to be drinking again. 

And so he did. And so he got drunk. And so he skipped work on Tuesday as well.

He also ignored Pepper’s calls. And texts. And emails. And he would’ve ignored even an owl had she send one. And those thoughts made him feel guilty. Because he sure should take her calls, hell, no, he actually should’ve called her already, because she didn’t even know what was going on with him, therefore it certainly wasn’t her fault. But he could not. He was not mad at her, but he knew that talking to her in that state of his wouldn’t make him -or her- any favors. So he just kept ignoring her and feeling guilty, and those feelings made him feel worse, and he only knew one way to treat those kind of feelings. So, more alcohol.

Four days in, the cycle was simple: Drinking to get drunk. Getting a hangover. Skipping work. Ignoring Pepper, and any sign of external life, for that matter, except for his security chief, Happy, probably so he wouldn’t call the police because of his sudden act of hiding from any kind of person. Feeling guilty over acting like a dysfunctional human being. Drinking to get drunk to forget his guilt. And so on.

So, for the fifth day, he decided that had been enough. He had to go out. Which would’ve been great if he hadn’t decided that after enough rum to make a pirate look like a rookie.

Alcohol is usually not good friends with decision making, proven point in the fact that he ended up in a club at 2 AM, where he hooked up with a random girl whom subsequently woke up in his bedroom the next day.

Which happened to be Saturday.

Which happened to be the day that Pepper decided that she was worried enough as to visit Tony.

Which she eventually did.


	5. Chapter 5

And she had access to the penthouse.

Tony woke up, exalted, when the apartment’s AI assistant gave Pepper a welcome. Crap.

Maybe if he hadn’t drink that much the night before his brain would’ve reacted quickly, but it didn’t, so the first time that he saw Pepper in a week was while he was still in bed, with a woman.

Before she entered the room, he heard her footsteps. And before he could think of anything to do, she was entering the bedroom.

“Tony?” She looked at him, then at the girl who was still sleeping, then again at him. “Oh.”  
“Pepper! I...”  
“It’s okay! I’ll show myself out.”  
“No, wait! Don’t go! I...”  
“I’ll be in the balcony, Tony, don’t worry, but I’m not really into this kind of stuff, you know?” And she left him there, looking like an idiot.  
“Who was that?” Asked the girl, who had just woken up.  
“What?”  
“You have a girlfriend?”  
“No! I... she’s my... partner. Business partner. You know, maybe you should go.”  
“Why is your business partner here?”  
“She’s here for... a meeting.”  
“Will you call me back?”  
“I don’t think so.”  
“Jerk.” And so she gathered her clothes and left.

Tony got up and ran out looking for Pepper, and he found her at the balcony, right where she said she would be. 

“Pepper! I’m sorry, I...”  
“It’s okay, Tony. Is your house. I shouldn’t have come without letting you know. But how could you know if you’ve been ignoring all my calls and messages for the last week?”  
“I... I didn’t mean to. I’m just... I’ve been... stressed.”  
“Yes, I could notice that. Girls can be exhausting.”  
“That’s... Ok, that was a huge mistake, but we both know that that’s not the worse thing that I’ve done, right?” She just shrugged. “Pepper, I can explain, really...”  
“Keep calm, Tony. You don’t have to explain to me what you do in your bedroom. I’m just worried about you, in general.”  
“Worried? Not mad?”  
“Mad? No. Well, I’m kinda pissed about you ignoring my efforts to reach to you, but I’m mainly worried about you being alive. I even got to think that Happy was hiding your corpse, since he’s the only one who appears to have had contact with you. Is this... does it have anything to do with what we talked last Friday?”  
“I’m not a corpse. And what? What do you mean? Well, maybe...”  
“I knew it.” She let out a sigh. “I know it is a lot to do, Tony, but I’m really going to be with you in every step of the road.”  
“What?”  
“Making the company self sustainable, of course. I know it’s not easy, but it’s going to be worthy.”  
“Right. Yes. It’s that... it’s a lot of work, and paperwork, and...”  
“And we’ll take it calmly. We can work on it from the sidelines. I think you haven’t told anyone but me, correct me if I’m wrong, and I don’t plan on telling anyone either, of course, so we have time until everything’s perfect. What do you think?” He hadn’t been precisely thinking about the company, but if that’s what she wanted to hear...  
“Yes. Exactly. I... I was worried that we would’ve to do it just now, but, of course, what you’re saying makes a lot of sense, so...”  
“Tony, are you sure you’re okay?”  
“Yes... No. I’m really not, Pepper, I’m sorry, I...”  
“It’s okay, Tony, really, you know I’m not judging you.”  
“I know, and... maybe you should. I mean, loot at this! I’ve been staying here, and drinking, and being a jackass, and you’ve been worrying about the company, and about me, and that makes me feel like the biggest trash bag in the world.”  
“Don’t. You’re not. You’re a literal genius, and a good boss, and maybe you could be a better friend, but I know you’re good. And you need to calm down now, ok?” She said, while looking directly into his eyes, holding his shoulders. “And now, you should go and take a shower, because you actually stink a little.” She laughed, he sighed, but letting a little smile cross his face.  
“Oui, mademoiselle. Can we talk later?”  
“Oh, you think that I’m leaving? Don’t count on that, Mr. Stark. I’ll be trying to make magic with whatever you have in your fridge, you need to eat.”  
“You don’t have to.”  
“No, but I always go the extra mile, Tony. Now go.”

Tony started thinking. Why had he been doing all of that stuff to begin with? Pepper was still there, so, why was he acting like he wouldn’t see her ever again? Of course, the ring. But one can take a ring out of a finger, right? Only that he certainly couldn’t do that if he only spent his days being a drunk hermit. He would lose her for good if he kept behaving like that.

So he followed her command and went straight to the shower. He was still hungover, once again, but he was feeling somehow different. Like, he knew that his heart was still burning, hopefully only metaphorically, but he also felt somehow... lighter. With some sense of determination, and maybe, perhaps, hope.


	6. Chapter 6

After taking a shower, Tony got out of the room to find Pepper finishing some meal that smelled delicious. He didn’t know that she was into cooking, but apparently she was as great at that as she was at everything else. They took breakfast -or lunch, for that matter- quietly and Tony let his head settle for a moment. The last week seemed ridiculous. Shameful, actually. It was even all blurry, and he couldn’t help but feel like the kind of person who lives in their parents’ basement just because he doesn’t know better. But he wasn’t that kind of person. He was just being utterly irresponsible, not being grown enough as to face his problems. And his problems were making him food and worrying about his well being. He could be so damn self-absorbed sometimes, he realized, and at least that’s a step. He didn’t know to what, but that should certainly be a step to something. So, after finishing the meal, Tony went to do something that he then felt as necessary. 

“Pepper, I need to say something that I don’t usually say.”  
“That’ll be a challenge, since you tend to say a lot.”  
“Yes, but not this.” He took a deep sigh. “First of all, I want to apologize to you for the last week.”  
“There’s no need to, Tony. I told you it’s alright and I understand.”  
“But there is the need to, Pepper. Because it’s not alright. It’s not good that I can’t face my problems and that I ignore the only person I can rely on. And for that I apologize.”  
“Tony, I... really, it’s good, I’m seriously not mad at you.”  
“But I couldn’t blame you if you were. I go and tell you something and then I disappear and that is not okay.”  
“We can agree on that, it is not. But I can forgive you. Is it good this way?”  
“This I can accept. Which leads me to the second point. I want to thank you for...” What was he thanking her for? The food? The calls, even when he didn’t took them? Visiting him? Forgiving him? Being his COO? His best friend? Breathing? Existing? The list was actually pretty long.  
“For...”  
“See, Pepper, there’s no easy way to say it. I want. No. I need to thank you for everything. Because that’s the only word that comes close to the truth.”  
“Wow... that was... unexpected, to say the least. Are you getting all emotional?”  
“Don’t get used to it. But I mean it.”  
“I know. And I appreciate it. But there’s no need to, Tony.”  
“It is. I never tell you how much I appreciate you, how grateful I am that somehow you chose to spend your days stuck with me, how much I... I care about you, Pepper.”  
“Oh, Tony. I know that. I know that you don’t say it, but I know it. And I care about you too, how could I not? You’re my best friend, and basically all that I have in the world.”  
“Am I? What about your fiancé?”  
“Well, he’s there too, but relationships are a particular thing, and if something went wrong, I wouldn’t have him. But you would still be there.”  
“Yes. Yes I will. I mean, I would. If something went wrong. And always, actually.”  
“I know, Tony.” Pepper got up and kissed his forehead, in a very sweet way, and took the plates to the dishwasher.  
“Are you getting sentimental now, Potts?”  
“I’m just taking the moment, since it’s something very rare.”  
“Well, don’t take too much of such thing or I’m gonna get used to it.”


	7. Chapter 7

Tony and Pepper spent the rest of the day talking about the new projects for the company. Luckily, Tony was a literal genius and had many ideas along the conversation, because he had certainly not given any thought or research to how to make a company self sustainable.

They talked on the table, made plans and by the end of the day, there was actually a concept about the process to full self sustainability.

When it was getting late enough, Tony started feeling some sort of nervousness. He noticed then that he had been the whole day with Pepper, and the sudden realization that she would soon leave to her home made him feel anxious. He didn’t want her to go, because he would miss her and because he wasn’t even sure that he knew anymore how to behave without her.

So, when Pepper decided that it was the right time to leave, Tony felt his heart sunk into his chest one more time.

“Are you sure you want to leave already, Potts?” He said, trying to sound calm, even when there was nothing further from reality.  
“Well, I’m sure you can afford to pay me extra hours, Tony, but I don’t think that our peak of productivity will happen on a Saturday night, after we’ve talked for literal hours.”  
“Why not? It’s not like we have something better to do. I don’t have anything better to do. Do you?”  
“I actually had a date.”  
“A date.” Of course, it was not bad enough that she had to leave, she had to leave to go with the evil dude who was trying to take her away from him. “You’re leaving me for him then.”  
“Oh Tony, come on. I’m not. I cancelled. And it’s not a competition. You can’t be like that.”  
“You cancelled? Why?”  
“Because I was worried about you, and we were actually working, and now we seem to be in the right path to something good.”  
“You cancelled him for me?”  
“If you want to say it like that, then yes, I guess. What is going on with you, Tony? You’ve been acting extremely strange lately. More than usual.”  
“Nothing. It’s alright, it’s just... I don’t know” he sighed. “I guess I’m still worried about if you meant it when you said that you were going to stay with me in spite of Mr. Evil.”  
“Can you not do that? And I always mean what I say, you know that.”  
“Yes. But an engagement is... something serious, I guess? I don’t know, not that I’ve ever been engaged or something like that.”  
“It is, but it doesn’t change the rest of my life.”  
“It might. What if he doesn’t want you to spend time with me? What if he forbids you to be my COO?”  
“First of all, we’re in the 21st century, he can’t forbid me anything. If he tried to, I would certainly forbid him to be my fiancé. And second... if I didn’t know you, I would think that you’re jealous.”  
“Jealous? Of that man? God, no. I can’t be jealous of someone so stupid.” Only that he somehow was. Not professionally, of course. Or in general. He was a brat, but he wasn’t even that smart. And he had general villain vibes. But then, he was engaged to Pepper Potts, and he sure was jealous of that.   
“Whatever you say, Tony. Anyway, I really should go. Can we continue this later? Not tomorrow, since you probably should get some proper sleep, but I can try to manage my schedule so I have some spare time during the week.”  
“Are you going to see Killian when you leave?”  
“What does that have to do with any of the things that I just said?”  
“I don’t know... maybe he would try to steal the plans or something.”  
“Dear lord, no. And no. I’m just going to sleep, since apparently knowing that makes you happy.”  
“Yes, it certainly does, Miss Potts.”  
“Well then, we can call it a night.”  
“I guess so.”  
“I’ll see you on Monday, and I’ll call you tomorrow because I’m honestly hoping that I don’t have to come back here to drag you to the company.”  
“You won’t have to, I promise.”  
“Okay, then. Good night, Tony.”  
“Good night, Potts.”

They said their goodbyes, but just as Pepper got up and walked to the doorway, Tony felt the urge to do something else than just that, so he got up as well and ran to her.

“Potts.”  
“Yes, Tony?” She looked back. “Did I forget something?” She said, looking down at her purse, checking her stuff.  
“No, no. But I... thank you, Pepper.” And so he hugged her, awkwardly, and he realized that he’s not actually a hugger.  
“Wow, that was very unexpected.” She hugged him back, making it less weird. “I told you, Tony, there’s no need. Goodbye, now?”  
“Yes, sure. Have a good night, Pepper.”  
“You too, Tony. And could you do me a favor?”  
“Anything.”  
“Go straight to sleep and don’t drink anything that includes alcohol.”  
“I’ll do my best.”  
“I’m serious, Tony.”  
“So am I, Pepper.” She looked at him accusingly, as if she knew that he was probably thinking of getting some drink. “I promise. On the company.”  
“Thank you, that’s better. See you, boss.”

And then she smiled, and she left. And Tony, for the first time in that week, went directly to sleep, not drinking a single drop of alcohol, because he had just promised Pepper that, and even if she didn’t knew if he broke his promise, he would know, and that would be terrible.

He got into the bed, and he realized then that he was actually very tired. His restless nights didn’t do him any favors, and he was ready to take a break from all the madness that he had gotten himself into. Besides, he had just spent the whole day with Pepper, and he knew that she wasn’t going to Killian that night, and even if that made him a selfish man, he was relieved to know it. He could have at least a decent night of sleep then.


	8. Chapter 8

After a surprisingly good night of sleep, Tony spent Sunday revisiting the ideas he and Pepper had written down the day before, noticing that some of them were actually good, some of them sucked, and some of them would be pretty decent if he only had any idea of how to make them work.

Then he made some actual research about what it means to have a self sustainable company, because being a genius is useful, but it’s not enough, and he realized that he’d have a lot of work to do to make it happen, but he also decided alongside the research that it was actually a fantastic idea, and he thanked himself for at least thinking on something useful during his moment of panic. 

He actually promised Pepper the night before that he wouldn’t drink anything before going to bed, but he thought that extending the promise to that day was probably the best idea. In any case, before the last week of his life had happened, he had actually decided that he wanted to be healthier. 

So he didn’t drink, and he actually worked, he showered, and he ate the leftovers from Pepper’s meal. He would have to do some grocery shopping, he noticed. And then, before going to bed, he texted Pepper to let her know how much of a productive human he was being.

“Miss Potts. I don’t know if you’re sleeping yet, but I wanted to tell you I’ve done some more research. See you tomorrow at the office. TS.”

He didn’t do it for a reply, he just wanted to communicate his progress during the day, but of course that Pepper replied soon enough.

“Mr. Stark. I’m really glad to read that. I’ll make some space in my schedule tomorrow, I have some ideas to share as well. Have a good night, boss x”

And so he did, eventually. He didn’t reply again because he didn’t want to seem crazy. Not that he didn’t seem crazy any other day, but Pepper was right, he was acting strangely lately, in a very self conscious way, and he was certainly not used to that.

But in the verge of falling asleep, when he was at that point where you are not fully awake but you’re not sleeping either, Tony ended up thinking that he had to act, somehow. He had reacted like a defeated man when he saw the engagement ring, but what did he really know about Pepper’s relationship with Aldrich Killian? They had just been dating for a couple months, and Pepper almost never mentioned him. In fact, he really thought that she was single. And why would everybody think that you’re single if you’re so happily engaged? Maybe because she wasn’t? He didn’t know what, or how, but he was sure that something was off. 

So, diving in his thoughts, Tony decided that he had to do something. It wouldn’t be the first time that an engagement got called off, and he couldn’t simply let the love of his life go with an evil man. He had to act. He had to plan what to do. Maybe the company’s self sustainability was a really good idea once again, they had to spend some time working on that, and during that time, he would make sure that Pepper somehow saw how much she meant to him, in the way that mattered the most to him right then.


	9. Chapter 9

The next day, Tony got up early and got ready to work. He didn’t have the necessary to make a decent meal, so he’d have to pick something for breakfast on the way. 

While finishing his morning routine, he started thinking again what he had thought the night before. He started making a plan for the day to get to spend as much time as possible with Pepper, in a way that wouldn’t seem actually that awkward. 

When Happy showed up to pick him up, he didn’t have an entire plan, but enough of a guideline for himself to follow. He was sure that Pepper would appreciate if he showed up with coffee. Everybody loves coffee. People who work a lot love coffee, and Pepper certainly worked a lot, therefore she would love coffee an awful lot. So, since he anyways had to get something to eat, he told Happy to stop at some good place before getting to the office.

“Where to, boss?”  
“I don’t know. Don’t you ever shop at a good coffee shop? Where are my breakfasts from?”  
“I don’t really know, boss. I always send an intern.”  
“Really? And what do you do?”  
“I take care of security.”  
“In my own building, with a security system that I designed myself.”  
“Yes, and I’m in charge of that team, so I send an intern.”  
“You’re a work of art, Happy Hogan.”  
“Thank you, sir. Where do you wanna go then?”  
“I... you know that... you know what? Just stop at a Starbucks.”  
“No problem, boss.”

And so they went to a Starbucks that happened to be on the same block that the building and Tony actually got off of the car to buy breakfast for himself. He didn’t know why, but he felt like he needed to do that sort of normal-ish things if he wanted Pepper to see him as something other than her eccentric boss/friend/not fiancé.

Indecisive, he picked up a good variety of products. He wouldn’t probably eat all of them, that certainly wouldn’t be healthy, but he wasn’t actually sure of what he used to eat, since he never bought his food by himself, and he certainly didn’t have any idea of what would Pepper pick. But then again, he was somehow sure that she would like her coffee with vanilla. He didn’t know why, but he felt like he had to know that. So he picked a double espresso for him and a vanilla latte for Pepper, in a size that ended up being way too big even for him. What kind of sizes did they use in Starbucks? God, they didn’t make any sense. Couldn’t they just make small, medium and large? 

Anyways, he showed up at the building with two bags of baked goods and a tray with coffee. In reality, Happy was the one carrying the bags, but he paid for them, so it was basically the same to him. He walked to Pepper’s office and ignored Christine, her assistant, when she tried to tell him that she was on the phone with someone from Japan, and the he just knocked the glass door before entering anyway.

“Good morning, Miss Potts.” Pepper raised a finger, as telling him to wait, and kept talking on the phone. “Can I at least sit?” She rolled her eyes, but nodded. “Hogan, leave these bags here.”  
“No problem, boss. Anything else?”  
“We’re fine for now, thanks.”

And then Happy left, and there were just the two of them, and the bags of food, and the coffee tray. And whoever that was on the phone, but that person didn’t count.

After another ten minutes of phone talking by Pepper and tapping on the desk by Tony, Pepper said goodbye to whoever she was talking to and Tony sat still, like a kid whose mother has just started to pay attention to.

“So, couldn’t you wait, Tony?”  
“I waited.”  
“And you also made a drum solo on my desk, and also put in there two huge bags of... is this Starbucks?”  
“Yes, it is. And yes, the solo was good, and I was getting bored. And by the way, you didn’t say «good morning, Mr. Stark»”  
“And I’m not going to say it either.”  
“Why not?”  
“Because you almost interrupted me in the middle of an important conversation with a provider for your company.”  
“You’re the COO, that’s literally your job.”  
“I’m not complaining about the call, I’m complaining about my boss.”  
“Even after your boss brings you vanilla latte and freshly baked goods?”  
“Did my boss do that? Is that what’s on my desk?”  
“Yes, Miss Potts. So, you’re welcome.”  
“Why vanilla latte?”  
“You don’t like it?”  
“Vanilla latte is fine, I just didn’t think you had any idea of what I like.”  
“Well, as you can see, I always know many things.”  
“Show off.”  
“Is that how you talk to your boss?”  
“Yes, unless there’s a cream cheese croissant in one of those bags.”  
“It might be, but we’ll have to check.”  
“You don’t know what you bought?”  
“Honestly, I ordered one of each, so, I have no idea.”  
“Really, Tony? Isn’t that a bit too much even for you?”  
“What!? I did it to make sure I got something that you would like, Potts!”  
“And I suppose I appreciate it, even though it’s eccentric.”  
“That I can concede.”  
“Let me find a croissant then.”  
“Oui, mademoiselle.”

After searching for a while and emptying the bags all over the desk, they didn’t find a croissant, which was in equal parts disappointing and amusing.

“I can’t believe you didn’t buy a croissant, out of all things.”  
“I swear I had no idea of what was there.”  
“I’ll have this cheesecake brownie, I deserve it to put up with you.”  
“Be my guest.”  
“So, can you now tell me why were you interrupting me?”  
“Sure. To bring you coffee.”  
“Are you kidding, Tony?”  
“Do I look like I am? No, of course not. I wanted to be a good boss, and perhaps a good friend. One tries to make a nice gesture...”  
“It’s nice. Surprising, but nice. But sometimes I just can’t believe my boss is a 5-year-old.”  
“Just because I’m nice?”  
“Just because you demand a lot of attention.”  
“Well, yes, I need your attention. Did you clear your schedule already?”  
“Actually, yes. But I’ll have to reschedule again since you decided to arrive early and bring breakfast, two things that you certainly never do.”  
“I’m trying to make things differently now.”  
“Did you have an epiphany?”  
“Well, no. I don’t think so. But if the company is going to change, I should change as well. So, when are you free?”  
“I told you I’ll have to reschedule again.”  
“Oh, come on, Potts! I’ve only been here for like 15 minutes. Is that all you had cleared to talk about the future of my company?”  
“We’re barely getting started and we probably need all of our other deals to pay for the change of direction.”  
“I need more than 15 minutes, Potts. I didn’t want to do this, but I’ll have to command you to do so.”  
“Command me? Who are you?”  
“Well, technically, literally, I’m your boss, so...”  
“You’re unbelievable. Go away. Let me eat my cheesecake.”  
“Are you serious? Wait, are you upset?”  
“Should I be?” Pepper raised an eyebrow, while keeping a perfect poker face.  
“I don’t know. Did I overstep? Tell me I didn’t overstep. I was joking. Not really, since I really need more than 15 minutes, but really.”  
“Of course I’m not upset, Tony.” She rolled her eyes. “I’ll meet you at the end of the day. At 7:00. But now I really need to get working.”  
“You had me worried for a second, Potts. Alright then. Enjoy your baked goods, I’ll be in my office if you want to clear your schedule earlier.”  
“Don’t worry, I won’t.” She smiled and kept eating the piece of brownie, while Tony got out of the office.

He went to his office and suddenly felt hungry, then noticing that he didn’t even eat anything of all the things that he bought. He didn’t dare go back to Pepper’s office, in fear of actually annoying her and not having his time with her at the end of the day.

Being in fear of something, that’s something that he never did, except for when he had medical appointments, those terrified him. And talking about medical issues, all those new feelings that he was getting were almost way too much, he could feel them on his chest, or at least he hoped it was just his new found nervousness and not something else. Out of all things, being in a medical situation would’ve been the last thing he needed right then.


End file.
